shayla lilian

Sunday, August 24, 2014


these last few weeks have been crazy but exciting. i have fun (non-pregnant) news to share pretty soon, but for now i just want to recap the last few weeks, because they've been good ones. my aunt and cousin, lauren and rebecca, who live in australia, came to visit utah and it was so fun to spend some time with them. rebecca, who is my cousin closest to my age, and i have always gotten along really well. even though we usually go for years between seeing each other, we always just click whenever we do. it's always funny to me to see similarities between my family, even though most of us live on different continents. there's certainly something comforting about it.
anyways, i really loved showing rebecca around utah. she hadn't been here since the 90's, so we had plenty to do and see and eat. we went to flea markets and baby parties and twilight shows (local natives and great) and squaw peak and to the parade of homes...we drank cold-pressed juices and ate fresh waffles and donuts. we went on a shopping date with our moms and lauren spoiled us by buying us the most beautiful "friendship necklaces." pictured above :) it was such a good time and i absolutely love whenever i get to spend time with my family.
and this weekend, nicolaus and i had planned to go on a camping trip with his siblings and in-laws, but it ended up being a bit too rainy and chilly. so we've just spent the weekend at his parent's house, lounging around and hanging out with his family.
i can feel summer slowly slipping away. our long, warm days are about to become a bit chillier and a lot busier. as nice as this summer has been, i actually feel ready to jump into a real routine and am excited for what's to come!

Thursday, August 21, 2014


for august's book i read the road by cormac mccarthy. i've read a lot of sad books but this might be the saddest of them all. i also find a lot of post-apocalyptic world books to be frustrating, and this one was no exception. i wanted more details and more explanations. that all being said, i still thought this book was incredible.

the road was more about raw human emotion and spirit than about running away from zombies or heroically saving the world. for the most part it's pretty slow-paced and will meticulously pull at every one of your heart strings until you're left crying and thinking about how horribly ungrateful you are for your blessed life and how it would take you approximately 30 minutes before you died if placed in their situation.

will i ever want to read this book again? probably not. do i think everyone should read it at least once? probably.
aaand here are a few favorite quotes from it:

"just remember that the things you put into your head are there forever, he said. you might want to think about that. 
you forget some things, don't you?
yes. you forget what you want to remember and you remember what you want to forget."

"people are always getting ready for tomorrow. i didn't believe in that. tomorrow wasn't getting ready for them. it didn't even know they were there."

"you have my whole heart. you always did."

"no list of things to be done. the day providential to itself. the hour. there is no later. this is later. all things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. their birth in grief and ashes."

"keep a little fire burning. however small, however hidden."

Saturday, August 16, 2014


even though robin williams may have not recently been in the media spotlight, or the forefront of people's minds or conversations, it seems like his untimely death shocked us all. every one of my social feeds seemed to be overwhelmingly focused on robin williams. people were sharing their favorite movies, quotes and memories that included him. i feel like a big reason there was such a big response in social media is because my generation (who happen to be very active in the social media world) grew up with him in a sense. he starred in so many 90's classics. i know my siblings and i watched hook so much that the vhs tape eventually broke..
and then yesterday i heard the news that jay adams died at 53 years old. he's a bit less widely known than robin williams, but he was one of the guys that really revolutionized skateboarding into what it is today. he battled a lot of demons and spent time in and out of jail, but he had finally gotten to a good spot in his life. he was addiction-free and talking to kids about how it's not necessary to go through a lot of what he went through and has been an inspirational figure in helping them keep out of trouble. he died of a heart attack in mexico and was reportedly happy vacationing and surfing down there with his wife.
and on top of these two sad occurrences, this summer - more so than any other period in my life - has been littered with the sad news of untimely deaths of people i was either close to at one point in my life or relatives of people i'm close to. and then there have been two heartbreaking situations that i am close to that have in ways resolved themselves this summer. and why am i divulging all of this sadness on my blog? i guess all of these sad, hard times that i have either witnessed or experienced lately have really got me thinking. and i needed some sort of outlet to sort out and remember my thoughts about it..

first off, these two public deaths have their silver linings. they have opened up conversations of depression and addiction that need to be addressed. and although they left loved ones and fans behind, they have left their incredible legends behind for others to learn and grow from. and i am a firm believer that there is more to life than this earthly phase and i'm sure they will be able to find their peace and are in a better place. 

i have also come to realize just how strong and resilient people are. i have been so incredibly inspired by how people have handled their different trials. even when outsiders would completely understand these people crumbling or giving up hope, they haven't. life keeps moving and they have kept moving with it. it's beyond admirable to me when people ride out life's storms without giving up hope that it will all make sense one day.

and one last lesson all of these things have engrained in me is that i have no clue what other people are going through behind the scenes. even though people may only put a happy persona out there for the world to see, everyone has their trying times. no one's life is perfect and we should never assume so. in the wise words of plato, "be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." these are basic things we have all heard before, but they are so easy to forget. which i guess why i like blogging about them? to help me remember. that life really is short. it really is unpredictable. it really is hard. but it really is worth it. and i just want to always remember to forget the petty things and enjoy the little things.

Thursday, August 14, 2014


here are a few photos from the latest disposable camera i've been carrying around. i was pretty bummed that the photos we took at the wu tang concert didn't turn out..but i guess that's half the excitement of disposable cameras, right? you never really know how they'll turn out. and luckily this roll delivered a few gems :)

1. nicolaus at donner lake
2. jumping in the lake
3. quickly getting out of the lake
4. the la temple on the day of matt and courtney's wedding
5. kerry and her cute family at zuma beach
6. driving and singing to a lot of early 2000's rap on our way to the family reunion
7. paddle boarding at the family reunion
8. my cute cousin-in-law kaitlin and her boyfran eric
9. i love that place

Tuesday, August 12, 2014


last weekend was nick's family's reunion. it has been one of my favorite weekends for the past four summers. we camp at the same lake in southern utah every year. and every year we somehow end up going on a different kind of adventure. in the past it's been four-wheeling, shooting, cliff jumping, hiking and discovering petroglyphs etc. this year was full of swimming, paddle boarding, playing five crowns, star gazing and just kickin it with family. i love love love the family that i married into and i love that now it feels like i have relatives that actually live on the same continent as me! growing up i was always so jealous of my friends who went on an annual family reunion trip, so i couldn't be happier that now i have one to go to too :)

Wednesday, August 6, 2014


during this last trip to california, i wasn't really in the mood to film a lot while we were i didn't. and i wasn't planning on making a little home video from our road trip, until i got home and watched the elephant seal footage. that's when i knew it would be worth throwing something together. ha, but for real, i'm in love with them.

p.s. remember to click HD to watch it in high def!

Tuesday, August 5, 2014


once we made it down to newbury park (where nicolaus grew up), we had a wonderful weekend full of weddings, friends, family and lots and lots of delicious food. we stayed at our friend kerry's house, and it was so, so much fun to hang out her and her cute little family. we went to lexi and drake's wedding on friday night, then matt and courtney's on saturday. it was fun to see both couples that i met 3 summers ago, so happy and in love and getting married. plus, one of my favorite things about visiting newbury park and going to weddings/any sort of party/church is meeting people that nicolaus grew up with, and hearing all sorts of funny/cute/embarrassing stories about him :) 

anyways, between the sushi and tacos and donuts and lounging with friends, we did manage to get some good beach time in. nicolaus was a happy little camper to be back in the water surfing, and i was happy to be back in the warm sand. and on monday afternoon when we were at zuma beach with our friends, just swimming in the ocean, a ton of dolphins starting swimming by so close to shore! nicolaus and i just had to put our heads underwater to hear them, which was so cool! and at one point, when we ducked under a wave, nicolaus, who always keeps his eyes open underwater, saw a dolphin ride that same wave and rush by inches from my leg!! which is a little bit terrifying but i'm mostly bummed that my eyes were closed and i didn't see it and/or have a gopro on me! ha, but also really happy it didn't actually run into me and severely injure me..

the entire trip was so great and it seems to get harder and harder to say bye to our friends and leave newbury park every time we go there.